Another late start today in the Macklin household.
I think tour and home life are both starting to catch up with me. My body aches, my mind is slow, and I think my gut is predominantly made of cheese.
I had to head over to the in-laws first thing to hand over my car to one of my troupe so that they could drop it off in Maidstone – giving me an escape from the Kent-ish town on Friday at the end of tour. Getting back otherwise would require a train, and, frankly, money I don’t have.
The plan was to return home after passing on the car keys… but my wife and the little one followed me over shortly after and it looked like we’d be staying for lunch.
I spent a large portion of my day off trying to reorganise my phone so it wasn’t such a chaotic mess. I’m certainly happier with how it looks now, if nothing else. Although I still need to strip it off useless apps and optimise it for use.
Bad Daddy
One of the main things I wanted to improve at this year was spending time with my daughter, and making the most of it. I have these moments where, when she talks, I just feel like I’m melting because she’s so sweet. So funny and creative and just amazing. And I feel sad because I know it won’t last forever, and that I should make the most of it.
And then I have days like today, where I have the opportunity to spend that time with her, and yet I find myself preoccupied with other things, or simply finding her a touch frustrating.
It’s in these moments I feel pretty useless as a human – I recognise my faults, but I’m not exactly doing anything to fix it.
Goodbye Christmas
To finish up the day, we packed Christmas away for another year.
I’m also acutely aware that my tour is drawing to an end and that means the festive season will soon come to a close. I like the looks of the year ahead – I don’t know much about what might happen… but I’m a little concerned that my mood tends to take a turn for the worse in the cold weather and I don’t much like to be idle.
Still, let’s see how things go and whether I can turn things around.